Books, Books Everywhere... and Not a Thing to Read

I found this great new book website called Good Reads

It's like a less social, social networking site. You can make lists of the books you read, are reading, or want to read, search and save your favorite quotes, review books, search book lists, discuss books with other members, and add friends to your little reading circles. Like anything else that you can customize, I'm obsessed.

While on this kick of book researching, I managed to come across this blog written by this girl, Angie, who's reading a book a day for a year and blogging about it. Pretty interesting way to spend a year. Kinda reminds me of that guy a couple years back who got his family to go 'dark' for a year to lessen their carbon footprint.  Diana Sawyer interviewed him.  It'd be great if Angie could use the site to inspire good. Like having people donate to their libraries or literacy programs? In any case here's the site: A Book A Day. 

Speaking of literacy and book programs, you should definitely check out 826 Valencia. It's a program created by Dave Eggers to help kids improve their writing skills and help teachers get their students excited about the literary arts. The site is definitely worth a glance and it's mission is definitely worthy of support. I highly recommend you check out Dave Eggers on Ted.com. Eggers is a pretty great writer as well and his quarterly McSweeney's is worth a look too.

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There's No Crying in Baseball: A Economic Rant

So obviously if you're a human being in this country with any kind of knowledge outside of your nose you know we dealing with tough economic times. I am completely sympathetic to this, not least of which is because my company has really felt the burn, but there are several things that just push my buttons about the whole thing. What follows is the most structured attempt possible at conveying my disgust at certain areas of shortsightedness.

1. How dare the news spend the first 15 minutes discussing rising unemployment, falling stocks, and general dooms day stories, only to follow it with news that Phillies "star" Ryan Howard is getting $59 million for three years. For what?!? Hitting a ball???! That's absolutely absurd, and it's even more absurd that the media or Phillies organization would report that as acceptable.

Let's take this a step further. Why should celebrities, sports players, and even newscasters receive these huge paydays while the rest of the country suffers? Everyone's getting on big business and corporations to cut their huge paydays. Why isn't anyone talking about celebrities taking cuts? I can't stand it! Somehow we've become a society of such moral neutrality that we continue to reward someone that's "work" consists of spending 20 hours a day pampering themselves or playing with a ball. In my opinion it's practically a mortal sin that Howard would take that kind of payday while there are families in this country losing their houses, out of work, struggling to care for their children. 

Madoff runs off with peoples millions and gets to go back to living in his penthouse, while some of his victims spend the rest of their lives working, their nest egg and dreams destroyed. Joseph Heller once wrote , " For war there is always enough. It's peace that's expensive." It's the same thing here. For the rich, there is no limit to their amassing wealth, it's those in need that are doomed to remain victims. As far as I can see, if sports players and celebrities can still make that kind of money, than there's no excuse for not bailing out middle America. There's obviously enough discretionary money left in the country to do that. In fact, I'll take it one step further with this particular point. I say, instead of focusing on Wall Street, maybe we should be focused on cutting the over inflated salaries in Hollywood. 

2. This complaint isn't far removed from number one. Why does it seem so difficult for the media to understand that continuing to tell the public how bad things are only serves to make it worse? If you are charged with reporting the news, you should do so responsibly. "Yes, things are bad, but here's what we as nation need to do to improve things." If I sat in front of  the television all day and listened to everything they say, I'd never go out and spend a dime either. If I lived in middle America, I might not even leave my house. Short of preparing for the Apocalypse I probably wouldn't do anything.

If everyone- especially the media- would look at the bigger picture they'd see spreading panic isn't conducive to improvement. Say I live in middle America, I shop at Walmart, eat at local restaurants. Watching the news I continue to hear how bad things are. Now I'm starting to panic. I'm not going to spend what little discretionary income I have. In fact, I'm probably gonna cut back how I spend in general. I'll stop going out to eat, start buying generic brands at the supermarket.

Down the street at Bob's restaurant business is slow, cause it's not just me that stopped eating out. Less business means Bob's is over staffed, so Bob has to start laying people off. But less employees doesn't cut enough of a dent in expenses. And those employees and their families won't be coming in to eat. They can't afford to do that. Before you know it Bob's is out of business. Which not only affects the remaining employees and Bob, but impacts the vendors who supplied Bob's restaurant. 

Mass hysteria breeds mass hysteria. If we don't want more layoffs we should continue to encourage people to create the need. Supply and demand. Jobs are cut when demand and need don't exist. As far as I'm concerned any stimulus plan that relies on giving people money to spend, to jump-start the economy, is bound to fail. People will continue to save the money or will spend it on necessities. If we want things to get better we need to start with more constructive news reporting. The media will drive us into a depression.

And another thing. From my observations, people are still going out to dinner, still have large shopping orders at the supermarket, and are still going to the mall. Now, I'm not saying things aren't bad, but what I am saying is they aren't as dire as the media projects. Sensationalism is a dangerous thing.

I think that's probably enough of a rant for one night.

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Pillowcases: A Rant

This is what a dozen pillowcases look like...

I picked something festive so you wouldn't be overwhelmed or frightened....

You are probably wondering why I've chosen to focus on pillowcases as the subject of a rant. Well here's why, because that harmless looking pile of pillowcases would take me about five days to get pillows squeezed into them. 

Yes. 

It's true. 

Years of education. Years of acquiring points facts and skills. And yet I am completely unable to successfully put a pillowcase on a pillow.

I have tried for years. It's the worse part of the bed making process. The easiest part of folding the sheets becomes the most difficult part of using them. I literally must always enlist the help of someone if I want the job done right.

It's a showdown: 

vs.

No matter how hard I try I can never get the seams of the pillowcases to properly align with the pillow itself. I twist and turn and nothing happens. I shove my arm in there to redirect the pillow only to find my arm is too short. I'm up to my shoulder in pillowcase while the pillow is still 3/4 out of the case. Well of course! How can the pillow possibly fit while I'm all up in it.

Around this time I get mad. I've already wasted five minutes trying to figure out which way the fitted sheet goes. Another five determining which side is up on the extra sheet. So I begin shaking the pillowcase, with what little bit of pillow is in there. Hoping the magic of air and motion will get the pillow in its case. One of two things usually happens:

 1. Nothing. The pillow and its case are not at all convinced that they belong together and remain unaffected by the violent shaking.

2. What little success I had had up to that point was done in vain- the pillow falls out.

If nothing happens I normally take a slight more forceful approach and begin slams the pillow/pillowcase onto the bed. In any step of the process, should the pillow fall it, it's pretty obvious I throw a fit and walk away.

About half way in the case, I realize I have the tag side out. 

I need to start over. 

At this point I probably have already had a fit at least twice. I hate pillowcases.* This includes pillow fights....

..... because undoubtedly the feathers will come out and I have a fear of them stabbing me in the eye that's similar to my hay fear.

I should also note, that I would not recommend shaking, hitting, or swinging the pillow/pillowcase. All it does it fluff the pillow, making it even harder to fit into the case. 

Twenty minutes will go by. Thirty... I'll give up and come back.... then finally... finally I'll get the pillow in the case. 

After what seems like hours and many indignities I have successful put one pillow in one case. 

One down, three to go...

But here's the real kicker. Regardless of how perfect I finally put the pillow in the case, halfway through the night the pillow seems to slide right out of the case!

Now, I ask you, what does that say about pillowcase design? Did you know you can actually go to school for packaging engineering? It's true. I know someone that's doing it; it's the real deal. So why if people are spending all this time focused on proper packaging has no one improved the pillowcase? Are you saying it's perfectly designed?

My suggestion? Velcro. Sure it's loud as hell, but two, three sides of velcro on a pillowcase... now who's wasting time putting pillows in their cases? Or zippers. Shove that pillow in there, zip around the edge and you're good to go.

My god I focus on the most insane nonsense. 

*Except when used as candy collectors or filled with random objects and used as a weapon.

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I'm Quittin' You

I am officially announcing that I am giving up Chinese food.

After an unfortunate incident with some lo mein Saturday night...

I will no longer be participating in the enjoyment of chinese food, as a meal, snack, or otherwise. This incident will not be described in any further detail at this time, as the memories are still too painful. I will go on record as saying that I am devastated by this recent development and am sadden to have to end our relationship under these terms.

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Children of the Corn

Rach: cornfields? really?

me: yea i think so

Rach: how can corn stab you?

me: what if you fall? or you're sitting down and look up just as the corn falls off the branch? or someone could accidently/on purpose stab you.

Rach: stab you with what??? what part of a stalk of corn can stab you?

me: the actual corn silly

me: a piece of corn

me: as in corn on the cob

Rach: a piece of corn can't stab

me: hmmm.... i wonder

Rach: so corn on the cob before its stripped

Rach: that's what your telling me?

me: correct

me: it's not a fear i actively think about

me: i mean with hay or hayrides, getting it in my eye is my first thought

Rach: which is strange enough

Rach: i'm more afraid someone will trample me

me: really?

me: like in a crowd of people you'll go down and people will just continue walking? thus trampling you?

Rach: no silly at a hayride

me: hahaha...!!! how many people can they fit on hayrides??

me:... oh... the wagon. getting run over by the wagon.

Rach: no

me: in that case i think everyone should be concerned about falling off the wagon

Rach: hahahahahaha

me: no really... where does the trampling happen? i need to be prepared!

Rach: on the wagon by the other stupid people sitting on it with you, or by one of the people dressed in costume

me: how is that possible? like they just suddenly stand up and step on you?

Rach: i'm not saying this occurs all the time. i'm saying that would be my concern rather than hay getting in my eye

me: i'm afraid the costume people will mistake my hay fear with being scared and then throw the hay in my face

Rach: sort of

me: interesting....

Rach: hahaha

Rach: like getting on and off

me: well again, the falling off fear is definitely established

Rach: or a costume person getting too close and me backing off and running into someone else

me: what if i misjudge and fall off the wagon cause my eyes are closed? or someone pushes me?

Rach: its just too crowded on those damn things

me: hahaha!! what hayrides do you go on where everyone is standing? yes they are!! which is why throwing hay should never happen

me: but seriously... do you stand on hayrides? cause that's not even safe

Hay's Safety Issues (according to Wikipedia)

"Hay in general can cause a number of injuries to humans related to lifting and throwing bales, as well as risks related to stacking and storing, such as the danger of having a poorly-constructed stack collapse, causing either falls to people on the stack or injuries to people on the ground who are stuck by falling bales."

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